Bjørn, panel cleaner (Lost cargobay Part 1)

Bjørn, panel cleaner (Lost cargobay Part 1)
After two week were I had emergency-panel-cleaning service, the next week I will have only routine work to do.
So today morning I met the other panel cleaners and we checked which part of the ship we have to clean in this shift. It turn out that we have to check the engine bay deck.
In our ready-room we have a detailed plan of the ship with all electric scheme, so we can exactly see were there are panel.
We find out that there were also two cargo bays more at the far end of the deck.
Me and my collegue Jorgue were selected to look first for this cargo rooms and than to join the other in the engine bay.
We grabbed our panel-cleaner trolleys and went to this deck.
Jorgue started to check the panel of the first cargobay while I was looking for the second one.

But I couldn’t find any second cargo bay....

That was strange so I checked in my little map, but also here there was only one cargo bay shown….
Finally I went back to the ready room. On the big plan the second cargo-bay was cleary shown. Then I realised that the only door leading to it was a located in the hull.
So I went to my room (which I share with 4 other persones) and I grabbed my emergency space suite. I pick up my little panel-cleaning bag and went to a air-lock. A few minutes later I found the doors of the mysterious cargo bay.
Fortunately there was also a little Air-lock were I could enter.

Guard Logs

04:00 - Security member Järvinen assumes duty.
08:00 - Nothing to report.
12:00 - Nothing to report.
16:00 - Nothing to report.
20:00 - More of the same.
00:00 - Take a guess...

04:00 - Nothing to report.
08:00 - Flogged some recruits.
12:00 - Broke up a fight. Probably broke the sod's nose.
16:00 - Nothing to report.
20:00 - Helped recruit remember where he hid his lunch-money. Heh, heh...
00:00 - Security member Kurtz assumes duty.

04:00 - Ate doughnuts. Stale.
08:00 - Nothing to report.
12:00 - Security Chief Ulrich assumes duty.
16:00 - Arrested somebody. Forget what for...
20:00 - Ate doughnuts. Still Stale.
00:00 - Nothing to report.

04:00 - Security member Lahduttava assumes duty.
08:00 - Helped take recruits on tour of the brig.
12:00 - Ate doughnuts. Stale.
16:00 - Caught drunk cadet throwing rocks. None of them damaged too terrible...
20:00 - Nothing to report.
00:00 - Arrested rowdy cadet. Resisted arrest. Had to use force.

Hans, hydraulo-electro-technician, engineering (The attack, Part 2)

Hans, hydraulo-electro-technician, engineering (The attack, Part 2)

The automatic red alarm computer voice told the crew to go to their battle station and to keep ready for a fight. So I grabbed my tool-bag and sat in front of the hydraulo display with my colleague and our apprentice. In case a electro-hydraulic system would failed, we would be ready to go their and repair it. In the next half hours the metallic noise was heard again and again, but nobody told us what was going on.
In all the engine bay the technician were very nervous and somebody told us, this was an alien attack. Suddenly there was one violent explosion, followed by a metallic scratch.
The Chief-ensign tried to call the bridge crew to find out what happened, but nobody responded.
A few more metallic noises were heard and a crewmember told us, that he know what this was:
His brother was a year ago on a little astro-cartography ship. The ship was found completely destroyed and there was no trace of the crew. The ship looked like it had passed through a gigantic nutcracker and one theory was that the ship was opend like a can by alien and the crew was sucked out and eaten.
Just after he told this, 2more explosions were heard and also a very loud metallic sound, which make the whole ship tremble.
Now we were persuaded that aliens had enter the ship. Suddenly a noise was heard and two crewmembers climbed out of one Jeffrey tube.
They were working in the astrolab, located next to the hangar deck, as the whole deck was filled by smoke and so they escaped.
The Chief-ensign was in panic and told as to disconnect all lights, all electronic gear and turned off the engine, so that the alien would not find us.
10 minutes later we were all sitting at the end of the engine bay, with all possible tools in our hands, which could be used as weapon. On the engine deck we only had four security guards, which were armed and they decided to go at the end of the deck to see if the crewmembers in cargo bay 3 were still alive.
After a quarter hour they turned back and told that they couldn’t find anybody.
Then they decided to go to the next deck to see if there were still people alive in the upper deck. After a few minute they came back running and screaming, covered with green slime. They told us that aliens had spite at them. Finally we could take of their clothes and put them under an emergency shower. The spit of the monster had the same odour then the toilet-cleaner....
The next two hours nothing happened. We were sitting hidden under the panels and thought that every second big aliens could enter and eat us or our ships hull could be wrapped apart….
One hour later again a piercing metallic noise was heard and then a big metallic hit. Somebody screamed: “We all gonna die…”
The next three hours nothing happens but suddenly a com-voice was heard it was the captain who asked why we turned off the engine. The chief told us not to response since it could be trap.
After 30min the door open and we saw commander de Loire enter the bridge. And she starts to shout at our Chief-ensign….

Finally we heard what happened:
Since we were in the orbit of a moon the bridge crew and the officers decided to go for a picnic, so they sat in a shuttle. But then they realised that a stupid hangar-welder had weld the doors of the hangar bay…
So they tried with force to open them (first metallic scratch) and one of the door-enigne failed and started to burn, which turned on the red alarm. But since the officers were all sitting in the shuttle and having Apéro nobody was on the bridge to shut it off. After they tried several time to open the door a crewmember was sent to put some explosive on the door (first explosion). Since one explosion wasn’t enough two more was prepared. After this the door was opened and the shuttle leave. A few hour later when they came back the damaged door had to close again (last metallic noise).
The team of cargo bay 3 had also hide in one of their container…that was the reason why the security guards couldn’t find them.
And the green slime turned out to be normal toilet cleaner…The cleaning team which tried to hide in the sick bay thought that the security guards were aliens…

After 9 hours fear of death all crewmembers could turned back to their normal work and just because the officers decided to have a picnic….

Hans, Hydraulo-Electro-Technician, engineering (The attack, Part 1)

Hans, hydraulo-electro-technician, engineering (The attack, Part 1)

The heating system is finally working again (but nobody knows why). Now it is much more comfortable on the ship.
Anyway… yesterday I had a terrible day:
Actually it started very well. All hydraulo-systems were working nice and me, the other technician and our apprentice were sitting in front of the hydraulo-electro station and playing computer games.

The only allowed computer game in P-fleet is the package “P-GamesTM”. This package contains a lot of different games around Emperor Pirk.

There is for example a strategy battle game, where you are Pirk and you have to conquer the Earth. It’s called “Pirk conquers the earth” and there is also the extension “Pirk conquers the univers”.

Then there is a run-and-jump game called “Super-Pirk” and also the ego-shooter called “Pirkenstein”. Where Pirk is dropped by parachute on an alien planet and has to shoot down all aliens.

Then there is also the package “Pii-sports” with motion controls. This series is very funny there is for example, “Skiing with Pirk”, “Inlinescating with Pirk”, “paragliding with Pirk”, “climbing with Pirk”, “BMX-sports with Pirk”, “running with Pirk” and “swimming with Pirk”.
Of course there exist also multiplayer games. But these one are very boring, because the player who is selected to play Pirk is always winning.

Anyway we were just playing golf (“Pirk the golfmaster”) as we heard a very loud metallic scratch and a few minutes after this, the red alarm went on.
That was the begin of a 9 hour horror trip…

Natascha, Service Manager for Manager Services, deck 7-section 41-office13B8

Natascha, Service Manager for Manager Services, deck 7-section 41-office13B8

This night was very cold…in the whole ship the heating system failed. But as I arrived on Deck 7 to go to my office, it was around 25°C there. That was really great.
I put on my breather and started to take off the emergency space suit as a crewmember came out of the airlock. He carried a standard P-fleet bagpack in one hand and his pyjama and sleeping blanket in the other hand. He told me, that it was so cold now in all other decks that he couldn’t sleep, so he decided to take over a free cabin on this deck.
This was a very interesting information.
Two hours later, after sitting in my office and doing nothing I decided to have a look around on this deck.
I stick a little paper with the title “I’m back in a few minutes” and I started the tour. It turned out that deck 7 should have be an extra deck for administration and officers cabin. All the furniture is brandnew and very luxurious compared to the other decks. I could found a very nice woman closet with black marble washing bowl. And a few meters further I found a empty presidential suite, with a king-sized bed, privat hot water-shower, own food-distributors and coffee-machine and even a fully equipped bar. Comparing to my 4-persons cabin just next to engineering, this was much better, even if a have always to wear a breather. While the next lunch break, I went to my all cabin to pack my few personal things. Now I have the presidential suite only for me...

Hans, hydraulo-electro-technician, engineering

Hans, hydraulo-electro-technician, engineering
This night it was so cold in our cabin that my roommates and me had to dress with all our spare uniforms and to cover with supplemental blanket to be able to sleep. (Later it turned out to be a big problem in the heating system of the ship). In the morning it was my turn to get the breakfast-packet and coffee.
In the gangway of the ship it was even colder then in our room. Unfortunately when I arrived to the breakstfast-distribution-point it turned out that the coffee machine was not working.
There is a ship-wide recalibration of the coffee-machine and nobody can have coffee during this time. Another crewmember told me that Imperator Pirk himself, possesse a button in his office, where he can start the recalibration of all coffee machines in all ships in the fleet…wow, sounds amazing.
But since it was so cold, the food-distributor-crew proposed us hot water with milk and sugar. I took four mugs with hot water and all breakfast-packets and I went back to the roommates.
Wrapped in our blanket we then sat at the table and ate breakfast. Vladimir –he is astronavigator-assistant–, found that the “coffee” was delicious today and the both other were the same opinion, so I decided not to tell them that it is only water, sugar and milk…

Hugo, Security-Staff, Bridge

Hugo, Security-Staff, Bridge

My job is to stand next to the turbolift and to check that all people coming in, have the permission to be on the bridge. But since crewmen, which don’t have a permission-code will not be able to come up to the bridge, my job is useless.
But anyway.
I just stand next to the turbolift and wait.
It’s not so boring, there is the very sexy first officer de Loir and the nice Sweden communication officer (with here amazing boops).
So I’m just standing there, next to the turbolift.
A buddy told me that Pirks Imperial Vessel is only manned with sexy woman….Gosh I would like to be the security guard there….

Natascha, Service Manager for Manager Services, deck 7-section 41-office 13B8

Natascha, Service Manager for Manager Services, deck 7-section 41-office 13B8
Argh, the P-fleet organisation is completely obnoxious!! I was told my job would be to do statistics for the energy-management of the new twistdrive engine. But as I went to engine bay, I was told there is no twistdrive on this ship, only Twister1 and Twister2 have it.
It turned out that I should have been sent on Twister2 but due to administration problem I was sent to the wrong ship. After spending a half hour with our first commander Antoinette de Loir (she is a French aristocrat…), I was assigned to a new job.
I’m now “Service Manager for Manager Services“.
I have no idea what the hell I’m supposed to do. But I was told to go to my new office, possibly I would find more information there.
The office is on deck 7, section 41, office 13B8.
The problem starts already that the lift would not stop at deck 7 because the lift-software-guy forgot deck 7.
I was told that if I would like to go to deck 7 I have to take an emergency ladder. Okay that’s not a problem, I’m quite sportive.
Then I realised that the emergency ladder is not inside the ship, but outside.
I can’t figure out which stupid spaceship-architect had the idea to build a ladder outside of a space ship. That’s mad.
Then I was told that every crewmember owns an emergency space suit. Actually I found it under my bed. It’s a one-size-fits-all space suite and much too big for me.

One hour later I just did my first steps outside the ship and I immediately became space sick...I didn’t know where was up and down.
A technician who was also on his way on deck 7 pick me up and told me that there is no up and down anymore.
Finally I arrived on deck 7. Deck 7 has pressure but there is no connection to the fresh-air-recycling system, so that we are forced to wear a breather. I was told that due to money problem the last 2 meter of tube, which were necessary for the fresh-air system, couldn’t be bought.

Between section 29 and 32 I could locate section 41. The problem is that the guy who did the section numbering speaks very badly finish and mixed up the numbers (I also have problem with finish number I always mixed up kaksikymmentäyksi and kolmesataaviisi).

Two hours later I found my office in section 14 also due to numbering problem...
But in my office there was no hint about my future job. There was only a chair a table and an old computer. But at this time my shift was over and I climbed in my space suit.

Bjørn, panel cleaner, section upper decks

At two o clock this morning I had an emergency call. Somebody spilled his coffee on the navigation panel on the bridge. I put on my uniform (actually it is not a correct uniform but an ugly black t-shirt. ..the official reasonfor this uniform is that we have to test a new „antigerminal-antibacterial-nanosilver-antimycosal-hypertextured.-antimon coated“-material. But the true reason is that the twister-Serie are prototype ship and can fall apart at each minute, so the P-Fleet command was unlike spending a lots of money for uniform).
Yes,…Finally I arrived on the bridge...like usual the second commander was sleeping on the captains chair, the tactical officer was solving Sudokus and the cleaning team just finished to clean the ugly green carpet (which looks like vomit....). Now I have to explain my job: I’m not part of the regular cleaning team since the panel need special treatment.

First I studied “space ship facility management” at the P-fleet academia, then I did a formation for “zero gravity space craft furniture cleaning” and a special training for “panel and screen polishing”.
In a first time I have to disconnect the panel (if not I could launch lightballs by pressing a wrong button) in a second time I use a special product ( the „P-Panel-primarius-cleaner) to take away the sticking coffee. In a third time I do an after-cleaning with “P-panel-antes-cleaner” (If the panel is still sticky I can use another product called “P-Panel-antes-extremium-cleaner”). Then I finish with a three time polishing with the polish-collection “P-Panel-brillant-multipolisher”.
For this job I need at least 1 hour…then I went back to bed.

You could use twitter as well?

Could have a the crewmembers tweeting about their day to day activities. Might require a bit of effort, but could be pretty cool.