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Weird spy

This task is closed
Created atJuly 13, 2009
Created by(null)
ClosedJune 22, 2011
Shots given12
WreckupationsActor, Writer, Concept / Storyboard Artist

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Kerry O'Donoghue What HUMINT are really like
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Neveen Hanna sniffer
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Jason M. Sleeping Habits
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Thomas Shaddack Paranoia.
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Stig-Magnus Gjerald hmm
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Yan Pagh To stare or be stared at.
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Jason M. Pet Peeves
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Description

What kind of personal habits could a spy have that would make them seem weird?

They don't have to be related to their job, they could just be weird personal habits in general.

Amusing personal habits would be best, to give the audience a laugh.


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Kerry O'Donoghue May 20, 2010 16:45 4 Thumb-ups
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What HUMINT are really like

This is why I want to do Technical Advisor for Talent so you can get the descriptions of us right. NCIS LA transmitted on 18th May 2010 was the worse representation I have ever seen of us and also the terms used were totally wrong. The episode was called 'Burned' which was incorrect the Character was not burned, the office was on Lockdown. And don't get me on the character Peter Wingfield portrayed it was written atrociously and Pete could have played it a hell of a lot better than he did, I can say that because we grew up together.

First off there is no such thing as a 'Spy' check my profile on Linkedin that term is never used only in books. I am too old to really duck punches effectively but I still do an hour of Krav Maga a day, so now I teach for a group called Security Resource Management Training Institute (SRM-Ti if you want to google us, and www.awsg.us)

We are HUMINT (Human Intelligence Gatherers) we also operate a system called OSINT (Open Source Intelligence Gathering) OSINT means that you use sources that are generally in the public domain ie Company Searches, Telephone books, Land Registration etc, but you are never allowed to break the law by stealing information, tapping phones etc as OSINT is generally used in court prosecutions so the rules of evidence and chain of evidence applies or you don't get a conviction. We are part of what is called the IC (Intelligence Community) some are Field Ops others are Analysts - we from Field Ops don't generally get on with them as they are academics who have little or no field experience.

If you do Government work it is called being 'Tasked'. If you work for a private company it called being a 'Consultant'. My personal favourite is a 'Researcher' that covers a multitude of sins and means you sound slightly academic so no one asks you too may questions.

You will very rarely spot a HUMINT because we don't drive around in fast cars or wear designer cloths, on government salaries you can't afford it. We are not paranoid if anything we tend to be reckless with the attitude of as in my case if the terrorists I've looked at over the years haven't got me after 30 years including military service nothing will get me.

I could explain a lot more about what we jokingly call 'The Dark Arts' if anyone wants to know.

Stay safe,
Kerry

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Kerry O'Donoghue May 21, 2010 17:25 Flag

Yes PM is amazingly accurate. A friend of mine retired, she wanted to work in a shop so she applied to Woolworths as it was then. She got an interview and the manager said at the end, she would have been ideal for the job but he was afraid of one thing connected with her and that was shoplifting. Now Mary when not on a job is as honest as the day is long so she became rightly miffed at her honesty being questioned, Lets just say she politely queried why the manager thought she may be involved in theft.
He clarified his statement, he was not afraid of her stealing but because she was with a department called the Force Research Unit (NI) -google it you'll get the idea - the manager was afraid that someone would plant a bomb under the shop and 'lift it' off the ground. So she didn't get the job.

Another Friend of mine went for a security job in Toy's R Us when he left the forces, the HR person queried whether since he was SBS and UK Special Forces he may have problems dealing with children or young people who were shoplifting. By this time he had a pretty good idea he wasn't going to get the job so he decided he would have some fun with the HR person......our type of fun....so, he said that if dealing with a child he would do what he did with his own children which was tie them to a chair until the child owned up to what they had done. He always said that the look on the HR persons face as they blustered that their customer care policy was quite strict in relation to how even shop lifters are treated and it was not company policy to tie customers to chairs. she took him seriously. He now catches pirates of the African coast he says it's safer than dealing with children in Toys R Us.

That's just a couple of things our interactions with non-IC are the funniest of all.

(null) May 21, 2010 10:35 Flag

A sort of "Yes Minister" for intelligence?

Kerry O'Donoghue May 21, 2010 06:48 Flag

Hiya Kris,

You are very right about audiences being underestimated, my son is a print entertainment critic and he says the rule of thumb is that an audience should only have to follow one story line and tangential convergences are deemed by some as too complicated for the audience to follow. This came up when we were comparing Munich with Traffic for a script he is writing. Do you think that sometimes story lines and films are dummed down too much?

I think the reason why I get a bit miffed at story lines is because people see things on TV or in films and think that is what the job is really like, I know that from some that I’m teaching OSINT to now. Some decide to train in my (old) field and when they find it isn’t glamorous and about 80% can be as boring as hell unless you are in a situation where things go wrong and then it’s not bullets flying it’s down to hiding and trying to get yourself out of the mess you have ended up in which is the part of OSINT/HUMINT that I teach. Because it isn’t all James Bond and fast cars there can be a dropout rate of 45-50% because the job isn’t as exciting as it is on the TV.

If you ever want to make a comedy I can tell you some hysterical real events from military training and from operational times too. Would it be OK if gallows humour was used?

Anything you want from me just let me know.

Stay safe,
Kerry

(null) May 21, 2010 00:28 Flag

Kerry, thanks for all this, it does always sound better when these things are authentic. I cringe when "realistic" series have intelligence officers talking about MI5 and MI6. I know why writers use those terms, because they are trying to use terms that are familiar to a wider audience, but I think they're underestimating their audience's capacity to learn new things.

I should say though that Eurospy is on hold as I'm focusing mainly on Landing and a sideproject called Overlap.

However, when those are out of the way I will try to return to this project and see what can be done with it.

"First off there is no such thing as a 'Spy'"

I know, but the title of the production is also a reference to a 1960s film subgenre. :)

Also, I should add that this isn't a serious story. :)

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Anna Pekuri November 13, 2009 05:45 1 Thumb-up
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extreme perfectionist

The spy could be so perfectionist that he has to arrange even dropped litter in a perfect angle (e.g. someone throws a gum paper on the street, the spy would pick it up and place it back symmetrically or something).

Other one could be an eating habit. Every time the spy is about to eat he has to throw salt over his shoulders three times in total starting always with the left one. If not able to do so he has to stand up and do a chicken dance.

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(null) November 13, 2009 14:08 Flag

Hmm... yeah, that could work. Some kind of obsessive compulsive disorder.

Also, maybe this spy doesn't get out of the office much and has trouble coping with work in the field. :)

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Thomas Shaddack October 25, 2009 07:11 2 Thumb-ups
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Paranoia.

Is the phone bugged? Is the room bugged? Is somebody watching me? Who's that odd person that appears to follow me? Let's make a nonsensical route change with the car and see if the other car keeps following...

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Thomas Shaddack October 25, 2009 12:41 Flag

Somebody mentioned in another thread sleeping in a bathtub. This is actually done in some areas with more common night gunfight; a wooden house has generally insufficient stopping power for stray bullets, while a cast iron bathtub provides significantly better protection.

(null) October 25, 2009 11:34 Flag

Yeah... that's a good idea.

It's like the scene in Spielberg's Munich where the Israeli spy gets terrified of being assassinated by hidden devices so he ends up sleeping in the wardrobe.

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Adryan Linden August 05, 2009 02:30 1 Thumb-up
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The Pink Panther

My first thought of a weird spy is in the Pink Panther movies, in particular the character Jacques Clouseau played by Peter Sellers (most recently by Steve Martin). Many traits could be used from there.

My tips is that you study The Pink Panther movies and Peter Sellers because he is brilliant!

Links:

About Jacques Clouseau:
(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Inspector_Clouseau)

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Mathias Jürgens August 04, 2009 14:58 1 Thumb-up
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invisibility

he could think that he is invisible when he does not move.
also he could suffer to the illusion that nobody can recognice him, when he weares sunglasses/a hat/ his favourite college sports jacket

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Jason M. August 04, 2009 00:00 1 Thumb-up
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Pet Peeves

You could also try picking your pet peeves and applying it to the spies and seeing how the others react to it. For example, maybe chewing food with your mouth open or talking loudly on the phone. It'd be interesting to see what a spy would do to another spy when he's getting on his nerves.

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Jason M. August 03, 2009 23:57 2 Thumb-ups
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Sleeping Habits

Instead of sleeping in the bed, he likes to sleep in his bathtub. Maybe he's seen many people or killed people while they slept in their beds, so he prefers the bathtub where no one would think to look first.

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Yan Pagh July 13, 2009 17:47 1 Thumb-up
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To stare or be stared at.

Or he likes to stare at people.

Just looking at someone, without moving.

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Delphine August 03, 2009 20:29 Flag

Yeah, so that maybe he/she tries to imagine what the person thinks or where she leaves, her habits, hobbys...

At the end that would make our spy feel uncertain about others and unable to trust them... eventually he becomes paranoid :)

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Yan Pagh July 20, 2009 18:58 1 Thumb-up
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Sentimental.

He cries at movies, or is fanatic for some football team.

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Yan Pagh July 13, 2009 17:26 0 Thumb-ups
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Food!

He likes for instance, danish pastry.

And everytime he is close to a bakery he gives an extra stop, what could include him on certain torubles as for intance missing some person he would be following or even saving him as he senses the scent of danish pastry somewhere and leaves the room that is about to be invaded looking for that scent.

or have a confidential paper stick to his hand because he stil has his hands sticky, leaving marks on the paper.

He asks for it on restaurants before anything else, and always gets dissapointed if they dont have it.

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