|Created at||January 05, 2011|
|Created by||Stephen Dawson|
|Shots given||No shots yet.|
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Karen & Kylie announced to each other they had received marriage-proposals & asked for second-opinions before making their respective-decisions. Karen first met her boyfriend Peter at her dads coffee-shop & were going-steady since graduating college. Kylie first met boyfriend David way-back in elementary-school.
The ‘girls‘ were confident from their respective girlfriends the ‘boys‘ were not playing-the-field or using hookers, though for safety decided all should submit to the local-clinic for STI-checks...
Supporting each other the ‘girls‘ made clear to the ‘boys‘ STI-checks were mandatory on the grounds they wanted kids should they get married... Shocked at directness, Peter & David readily agreed both as they were in love & understood the concern of their respective-partners...
Not sexually-active Karen & Kylie knew their negative-results before they submitted to procedure though were greatly-relieved when the ‘boys‘ too came-back clear.
Karen & Kylie resolved to confide in [their] moms Sharon & Helen before accepting marriage-proposals with the STI-results. They had been dating for years, aware of many of their boyfriends ‘shortcomings‘; like most blokes they were slobs, a simple-test was agreed in their respective-homes. Preparing a simple cooked-breakfast & cleaning-up after themselves that evening would show how serious they were & how-ready to be live-in partners [if & when they lived together].
Sharon & Helen chatted over the kitchen-table for over-an-hour; both Peter & David ‘failed‘ their respective-tests, primarily cleanliness. Typical agreed Sharon & Helen, Stephen & John triumphed when they wiped-down the worktops & placed breakfast-bowls & cutlery in the dishwasher...
The ‘girls‘ were intent on the perfect double-wedding so they insisted on vetting speeches created before the big-day & most-definitely the jokes they would allocate over the coming months.
Stephen got the ball-rolling with clean golf & horse-racing;
Sitting upon a cloud one fine Fall [Autumn] morning Saint Peter turns to God and says ‘Look at that, Father Murray is playing golf. Strike him down dead with a bolt of lightening for breaking the Sabbath’. As our enthusiast swung his club God raised his hand. The ball flew into the air landing cleanly on the green and rolled into the hole 275 yards away. In amazement Saint Peter asked ‘Did you see that?’ to which God replied ‘Yes, but who is he going to tell?
Karen kissed Stephen on the forehead ‘Definitely keepers, me next‘;
Once upon a time in a land far away, a beautiful, independent, self-assured princess happened upon a frog as she sat contemplating ecological issues on the shores of an unpolluted pond in a verdant meadow near her castle.
The frog hopped into the princess' lap and said: Elegant Lady, I was once a handsome prince, until an evil witch cast a spell upon me. One kiss from you, however, and I will turn back into the dapper young prince that I am, and then, my sweet, we can marry and set up housekeeping in your castle with my mother, where you can prepare my meals, clean my clothes, bear my children, and feel forever grateful doing so.
That night, as the princess dined sumptuously on a repast of lightly sautéed frogs legs seasoned in a wine and onion cream sauce she chuckled to herself and thought: I don't think so.
Sharon quipped ‘Karen, is that suitable‘. Karen replied ‘Kylie is giggling, its a keeper too‘.
Kylie innocently smiled ‘I will top-that‘;
Opening the post a couple were pleased to receive a letter from their teenage daughter:
Summoned by the headmaster of a rather prestigious, with fees to match, co-ed high school the parents and their 17 year-old son drove through the gates, passing leafy grounds until they parked in the appointed zone.
Helen was unimpressed ‘For the stag-party maybe‘;
Persuaded to consult his physician prior to the forthcoming marriage to his 20-year-old sweetheart our 64-year-old hero laid out the agenda for their round-the-world honeymoon. From grape crushing in France, skiing in Switzerland, trekking across Egypt, backpacking across Australia, sea-fishing off San Francisco and shopping in New York they would return with a new baby on the way. Amazed the physician advised such a trip could be fatal. After a little thought our hero conceded he would be sorry if his bride did not make it back but they were very much in love.
Sitting in a pub 3 ‘scallies’ bet another £10 each they could travel anywhere in the UK by rail and only pay for one ticket. “Easy money” thought the other 3, so off they went to Liverpool Lime Street. The scallies bought one day-return to London, the challengers bought 3 and all six boarded the train.
Passing his son’s bedroom this bloke overheard his son praying:
This bloke walks into Toys ‘R Us to buy a Barbie for his daughter where he is confronted by the range and an assortment of prices.
As the weeks rolled-by the ‘boys‘ felt more-&-more ‘excluded‘; weddings were more a ‘girl‘ thing & to be honest they did not care about the pattern on the crockery & cutlery-shape. For the sit-down meal lamb was their preferred meat though there would be a vegetarian-option at the hotel. The evening buffet would be simple with mostly non-alcoholic drinks ensuring their guests could drive-home without the concern of being above the drink-drive limit.
Katie & Kelly were excited being chief flower-girls; wedding falling on the eve of a bank-holiday meant no school so they could stay-up late. A one-eighth glass of Champaign to celebrate would be nice, soft-drinks & fruit-juice for the rest.
Hotel & registry-office booked, dresses & morning-suits hired the ‘girls‘ were calmed-down by moms Sharon & Helen. Following a good nights sleep, breakfast & shower the brides-to-be were on their mobiles to bridesmaids Betty & Melanie ensuring everything was okay & no hitches.