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Future corporations

This task is closed
Created atFebruary 28, 2008
Created byTimo Vuorensola
ClosedNovember 25, 2009
Shots given130

Thumbs ranking

Jani Salomaa Bab-i-tube - Broadcast your baby
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6/6%
Andy Wade Boke
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5/5%
Jesse Dingleberry POWERAIRE
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4/4%
David Barak Preventative Medical Care
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4/4%
Jani Salomaa dnaDocs logo
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4/4%
Jalmari Raippalinn Human Lease
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3/3%
Benedict Gahan Google does everything
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3/3%

Closing Note

Awesome corporations. Best of these will be seen on the film, so hold tight!

Description

Iron Sky is set in the near future – 2018, to be exact. A lot of things have changed here on Earth, but mainly everything stays the same on the outside – just like ten years ago compared to present day.

Being a fiction film, one of the things we can’t use in Iron Sky is real corporations and corporate logoes (unless, of course, they give us millions and buy an intrusive product placement, preferably company tagline installed into the dialogue).

This task is all about making up new corporations. Here’s how it works: make up a believeable name for a corporation. It can be a corporation of any kind, just as long as it’s big, and add a short description along with the corporation name you came up with, like what type of a company this would be.

And don’t forget: it can be comedic, but preferably it’s more than just changing one letter to another or making up a dirty word – be creative.

Ps. If you feel graphically creative as well, you may add the company logo to the description (a rough sketch will do), but we have another task coming right after this one focused on creating the logoes for the companies.

Off you go, show me what you got!


This task is closed.

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No-user-picture-set
Jesse Dingleberry May 27, 2009 14:05 4 Thumb-ups
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POWERAIRE

That's not a typo, I mean SPORTS AIR. It comes in a compressed bottle and you are duped by marketing into buying and breathing it when doing sporty things. It's just city air with some flavour. They could make a special military grade air that might be present somewhere, or just promoted.

I was reminded of this chestnut by Luca's Atmosphere.

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Comments

Thomas Shaddack October 29, 2009 11:20 Flag

Why oh why does this remind me of bottled water?
(What about EVIAIR, spinoff of EVIAN? Or PerriAir, variant of Perrier? Or OzAIRka? Branching from selling overpriced water to selling overpriced air is fairly natural.)
(This could lead to an affair, when consumer testing lab discovered traces of molecules, or isotopic signatures, showing the air was filtered from New York City area instead of some posh region. Could be used in a news ticker on some screen.)

Regarding oxygen, back when I was at school, during chem tech labs we used to sniff pure oxygen from the bottle for the bomb calorimeter. Cleared the head nicely.

As a minor detail, medical oxygen has a little carbon dioxide added for stimulation of breathing. Human body is not sensitive to level of oxygen in blood, but only to level of carbon dioxide. (Hence the danger of hypoxia sneaking in undetected.)

Jesse Dingleberry June 01, 2009 06:20 Flag

That's what I was getting at Timo!
Not a bottle of air with usefully enriched oxygen, but a bottle of ordinary compressed air that just smells good, or like it's good for you. The breathing equivalent of an extreme energy bar made from chinese newspapers (as seen in The Simpsons I think), whereas Oxia is more of an exotic museli bar.
I would shop a bottle of it but frankly it'd be easier to build one in my shed than learn to make the gimp to what I want. I miss Photoshop.

Jani Salomaa May 31, 2009 21:36 Flag

Damn!! That was a real product i mentioned in below post!! Real world again surpasses the imagination:

http://www.oxia.com/

"Your Oxia™ Personal Oxygen dispenser contains approximately 6 to 8 Gallons (23 to 42 metric litres) of compressed oxygen-enriched air, made up of 90% Oxygen (O2) and 10% Nitrogen (N2).

The oxygen-enriched air contained in your Oxia™ Personal Oxygen dispenser is completely free of any contaminants or pollutants found in normal atmospheric air and polluted environments.

Every Oxia™ Personal Oxygen dispenser is filled by a professionally-trained technician in an Oxia™ controlled facility to ensure its contents are exactly as specified, and free from any contaminants and pollutants.

As an added safety mechanism, your Oxia™ Personal Oxygen dispenser also contains an internal 60 micron particle filter.

Jani Salomaa May 31, 2009 21:30 Flag

Personal oxygen already features in Lukas Moodyson's "Mammoth".

The main character (Gael Garciel Bernal) persofinies the gap between the richest and the poorest of the world by looking out on the polluted haze of Bangkok while sucking on personal oxygen in the penthouse of a 5 star hotel.

The bottle looked like a tiny diver's tank with a shawing cream bottle's mouthpiece. Sorry I couldn't find a screenshot with it.

Timo Vuorensola May 28, 2009 09:20 Flag

Great idea! I'm already picturing people jogging in the intoxicated New York streets with Swine Flu -style masks on, and a small colorful bottle on their side of POWERAIRE, giving them a feeling of jogging in the countryside - flavors could be:

* ALASKAN AIRE
* PINE FOREST AIRE
* SEASIDE AIRE

Anybody wanna design a bottle of Poweraire? It could be something small, like the size of a small Coke bottle, with one small cute tube from it connected to the mask.

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Toni Nummela April 28, 2008 09:01 1 Thumb-up
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Hervanta

I think Hervanta could be a great international company name. It's a nonsense name (like Yamaha) so nobody knows exactly what it means. That way its products can be almost everything (like Yamaha: from trombones to motorbikes) . I'd like to hear from someone who doesn't know what Hervanta really is (do we have anyone here on board?) and say what a company with that name could manufacture.

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Comments

Peter Vesterbacka October 28, 2009 23:32 Flag

Only now found this shot. Hervanta is a great name, somebody should do a logo and a story about what Hervanta Corporation is making.

Timo-Heikki Mäkelä April 29, 2008 20:59 Flag

I think the logo should consist of some obscure cubes and such. Nothing too obvious, but still hilariously hinting of the buildings there.

Timo Vuorensola April 28, 2008 20:38 Flag

Yeah, Hervanta has some nice ring to it. Definitively! Anybody got a logo? :)

Timo-Heikki Mäkelä April 28, 2008 20:02 Flag

That would be funny, indeed. As a Finn i do know what Hervanta is, but I still don't know the meaning of the word as such. It could be anything. And knowing what it actually is, would just make it even funnier.

Jani Salomaa October 23, 2009 08:53 1 Thumb-up
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Human lease or second chance logo

Here's a logo suggestion for Jalmari Raippalinn's idea of a corporation you can sell yourself completely to. http://www.wreckamovie.com/shots/show/45

The logo's PRETTY bleak, but kinda cool at the same time.

I really wish PDF files would show as thumbnails.. Vector is the way to go with logos, and now i have to post both PDF and JPG files so you guys can have an instant preview.

Human_lease2_thumb

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Peter Vesterbacka October 25, 2009 22:57 Flag

I hear you! Any ideas for something that would generate proper PDF thumbnails?

Benedict Gahan October 21, 2009 20:38 3 Thumb-ups
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Google does everything

Google does everything... and has adwords on everything too!

You need a google account to enter your house (you don''t enter your house - you log into it).

An using a combination of google voice and google translate everyone can talk to each other in their own languages despite speaking different languages.

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(null) October 22, 2009 18:21 Flag

Blade Runner was the worst: Pan Am, Atari, Bell Telephone etc all bankrupt or broken up fairly soon after being in the film. Only Coca-Cola seems to have survived.

Benedict Gahan October 22, 2009 15:54 Flag

... but the best part about film is looking back att the expectations we had then... Its great to see panam in all the old american movies!... Gives a film culture! :-)

(null) October 22, 2009 11:17 Flag

Being serious, I would avoid any real world brand names. We all know what happened to IBM despite it seeming invincible during the 1980s, nowadays they don't even manufacture any hardware.

Benedict Gahan October 22, 2009 09:49 Flag

I think the two Os in google could be swastikas!

Peter Vesterbacka October 22, 2009 07:48 Flag

Yes. And there should be a new design for the logo too. Google already is doing that, so what would the Google look like after 2018? The Moon Nazi version of the Google logo...

(null) October 21, 2009 21:58 Flag

They could rename it Göögle...

Peter Vesterbacka October 21, 2009 21:30 Flag

And Google knows everything about you, that would be pretty bad in the hands of the Moon Nazis...

(null) October 21, 2009 20:44 Flag

Yes indeed, Google is the new IBM... ;)

Benedict Gahan October 21, 2009 20:35 2 Thumb-ups
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Apple Computers is supplying to the military

Apple is now making super designed spaceships for the military... they are minimalistic, stylish and never crash... oh, and its has a big glowing apple on its arse!

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Benedict Gahan October 22, 2009 16:01 Flag

Ala steve jobs, all employees wear turtle necks, jeans and sneakers and steve jobs is regarded as a something akin to Mao!

Peter Vesterbacka October 21, 2009 21:29 Flag

And that Star Trek scene on the iMac screen looks awesome. Immediately got my attention on the Apple webpages. Very cool attention to detail. Maybe somebody could create a few with Iron Sky screenshots instead.

Benedict Gahan October 21, 2009 20:39 Flag

... and the nazi's use linux!... practical but slightly ugly!

Dario Odobasich September 11, 2009 13:34 1 Thumb-up
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Rent-A-Gew

A company which made a Gew clones for a household help, like:
Washing dishes (Dishwashers are still inaccurate devices)
Dust cleaning (Rainbow is still too expensive)
Wallpainting (because when Boss wakes up in the morning, he is often really mad when he see walls with same colour as yesterday)
Human TV remote controller (just say: switch to RTL, now to SKY, now to...)
Washing the Boss (because Boss is working as chimney-sweeper)
Reading newspapers aloud to the Boss when he is lunching
and so on...

Disclaimer: This one has absolutely nothing with (J)ews so no inappropriate or offensive flag is needed. Any similarity is purely accidental :-)

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Useme_thumb
Daniel Michael O'Connell June 07, 2009 16:16 2 Thumb-ups
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Soft Drinks, Again...

"Fantome."

The Nazi Soft-Drink-- produced & distributed by the shady VrilCo, apparatus to the underground (literally & figuratively) Vril Society.

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Alexander Priddy August 17, 2009 23:59 Flag

vril society influence, i love it!

Jani Salomaa May 05, 2009 22:48 6 Thumb-ups
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Bab-i-tube - Broadcast your baby

I got a better idea for my old logo, and thought i'd share it to see if it catches on:

Bab-i-Tube --- Broadcast Your Baby

Follow the miracle of life inside your belly and share the magic with the world!

With Bab-i-Tube, you can film and share the very beginning of your baby's precious life. Just attach a wireless Bab-i-Cam to your belly, and start recording!

The radioscopic Bab-i-Cam captures your baby's every first move in glorious full color HD. Wireless real-time feed to your TV, PC and online web page!

Bab-i-Tube comes with a free online service! Share your pregnancy with your friends all around the world in real time at www.bab-i-tube.com. Starting your own video baby blog is as easy as 1-2-3!

Bab_i_tube_web_advertisement_thumb

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Seppo Hiltunen August 12, 2009 08:53 Flag

the first picture of my now 2 -year old grandchild was one e-mail from my son, where he sent me an ultrasound picture of that child in the belly of her mother. So that is nowadays life already. ;)

Jani Salomaa August 12, 2009 00:26 Flag

You know, i was sure i'd be put to an institution for dreaming up this god-awful idea...

But it is not that far off from real life: Pro-life movement revels in publishing pics of fetuses. Even National Geographic has them.

And considering the human being's competitive nature, which has dreamed up baby beauty competitions, why not a fetus beauty competition?

Seppo Hiltunen August 10, 2009 12:24 Flag

facebook for the baby in the belly ;)

Angela R. August 10, 2009 12:20 Flag

So disturbing... yes, I bet this could indeed have success in real life!

Genericskullihavenoimagination_by_planetstar_thumb
BB2BB July 21, 2009 11:52 1 Thumb-up
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Bizarro's Fat Flavour!

Now with 50% less fat!

Bizarros_thumb

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Mad Mike July 18, 2009 16:59 1 Thumb-up
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Mc. Burger Kong

It's basically a fusion of the big fast food companies. The Logo would be a Gorilla (a bit like Donkey Kong) holding a giant burger in his hands.
Sadly my poor drawing Skills do not allow me to make a logo right now ;)

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