Crop circles now main cause of crop failure in European Union

The recent thousandfold rise in mysterious circles in corn fields has become the number one cause of farming losses in Europe, an EU report revealed today. The immediate cost of compensating farmers totals €18 billion, with more likely to be incurred through indirect costs later.

"We're totally baffled!" exclaimed Agriculture Commissioner Cyder Dranker "They've started appearing all over the place lately, it's as if the UFOs are using us as a landing field."

Adding to the mystery, the most recent shapes are non-circular, often more closely resembling swastikas. Their frequency also seemed to increase sharply during a recent lunar eclipse.

"We have to admit it just makes no sense." Dranker says, "What could explain all these things? Nazi flying saucers from the moon perhaps?"

(Inspired by http://www.wreckamovie.com/shots/show/1303 )