Call to end discrimination against total shitheads

At the latest Global Conference Against Prejudice, delegates pledged to defend the rights of individuals who suffer from Involuntary Impaired Morality (IIM), more commonly known as total shitheads.

"For too long we've been trying to use so-called bad people as scapegoats, as the ultimate minority that we can blame for everything." explained Professor Rupert Trousers, a researcher with extensive experience of working with the shithead community.

"Last week my disabled, elderly mother had her car set on fire by a group of shitheads who laughed, kicked and punched her as she tried in vain to put the flames out. I love my mother and it would be easy for me to blame them for her suffering. Instead I choose to do the difficult but responsible thing and blame society as a whole for failing to help those who suffer from IIM."

"And think how much damage we all do with our high carbon lifestyles, with our cheap consumer goods made on starvation wages in third world sweatshops, and our limitless desire for lower prices at any cost. Who are the real shitheads?" asked Prof. Trousers.

He continued: "By some studies total shitheads make up as much as 20% of the population, yet for thousands of years they've been depicted as society's villains, frequently presented as the source of the world's evils. The conference hopes to make people appreciate shitheads' positive contributions to society instead."

"My mother got a brand new car after they set her old one on fire. Total shitheads can bring a wonderfully refreshing sense of renewal to life. They can force us to re-evaluate our own sense of morality, and change ourselves for the better. That's something we should appreciate."

(Inspired by http://www.wreckamovie.com/shots/show/1242 )