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Christopher Carpenter commented a shot

Spearhead > Spearhead Outline > Distance it from Trek?
by: (null)
At the moment it reads a LOT like a Star Trek film story, I think Trek 6 had a plot a little bit like this? You might want to change some of the setting (especially the names) so that it doesn't seem so close to Trek.

736 days ago | 1 Thumb-up

Well, I'm heavily influenced by Star Trek and Stargate. As far as the names, those will change, I am just using those for now. I wanted to put this up, so everyone has an idea of what my vision is, so that the plot, settings, and names can be hashed out, like you said.

Carl Voluntaryist commented a shot

736 days ago | 1 Thumb-up

Strange, I thought it sounds more like Gundam. (without the giant robots)

(null) gave a shot "Distance it from Trek?" for Spearhead

Spearhead > Spearhead Outline > Distance it from Trek?
Here is a brief outline I have for the plot. The time is approximate and free to change. What are your thoughts/ideas? Spearhead Outline I. President of the Federation is assassinated by a member of the military in the Federation. An elaborate plan to frame the Empire is put in place, to invade their home world. Days later at the Academy, Captain Daniels is giving a speech at graduation when an explosion goes off, targeting key military members in attendance. (20 minutes) II. The departure of the ENDEAVOR, the lead military vessel, begins the invasion. The Endeavor led fleet encounters heavy resistance from the Empire. During an intense battle, the Federation support vessels jump away from the fight, leaving the Endeavor alone, fighting an Empire Armada. The Endeavor surrenders, and the Empire take Captain Daniels, and his staff prisoners aboard their ships. (30 minutes) III. On-board the Empire ship, the Empire Captain tries to convince Captain Daniels that the Empire has nothing to due with the assassination, and that it was an inside job. The Empire has a spy on the inside with vital intel in regards to the assassination that is shown to Captain Daniels, who is hesitant to believe it. To show their innocence, the Empire lets the Endeavor leave with Captain Daniels. The Endeavor heads toward the Empire home world alone. (15 minutes) IV. On their way to the Empire home world, the Endeavor encounters another race that they have never seen before. They attack the Endeavor, using weapons that have been documented in the Albitro Wars by an unnamed race. This new race, is superior in technology and offers to help the Endeavor reach the Empire home world faster than their current pace. Captain Daniels and 3 members of his crew (Science Officer, Tactical Officer and Chief Engineer) board the alien ship, and head to the home world. (15 minutes) V. The alien ships arrives at the home world, just before a Federation armada. The alien ship goes cloaked, as the Federation arrives. The Federation opens talks to the home world to discuss surrender, and the alien ship monitors the conversation. During the talks, the Chief of World Military on board, confirms the information of treason. Captain Daniels demands that the new aliens confront the Federation, however they do not. The Federation attacks the Empire home world, however the Empire has re-enforcements and destroy the Federation ships. Distraught, the alien ship takes Captain Daniels and his staff back to the Endeavor. (20 minutes) VI. As Captain Daniels and his staff arrive back on the Endeavor, they head back to Earth. Captain Daniels ignores orders from Earth command to head to the Empire home world. Command threatens to meet Captain Daniels with force if he returns to Earth. A close friend to Captain Daniels is called to lead an armada against a hostile vessel headed to earth, though he does not know who it is at the time. As the Endeavor arrives, Captain Daniels informs his friend of the information he has learned, but he doesn't believe him. Captain Daniels refuses to surrender, and before a fight begins, the Alien ship uncloaks. Unab;e to sway his friends mind, Captain Daniels and the Endeavor engage in a firefight with the Earth Armada. The Alien ship makes quick work of some of the support vessels, ultimately leading to the surrender of the Earth Armada. (25 minutes) VII. Captain Daniels takes his friend on-board the Endeavor, shows him the information, and together, they both go to Earth Command to confront acting Chief of Earth Military. Unable to take him peacefully, a firefight ensues, taking the life of the acting Chief, and seriously wounding Captain Daniels friend. Security surrounds Captain Daniels and he gives up. During court-martial, Captain Daniels manages to convince everyone with the evidence he has of the treason, and the Federation and Empire call a cease fire. The Alien ship appears in orbit after the trial, damaged, requesting assistance. Once Captain Daniels and a boarding party arrive on board, they discover that many of the crew is dead, and a video message is left, telling them to go to their home world. (20 minutes) Total: 145 minutes.

736 days ago | 3 Comments | 2 Thumb-ups

At the moment it reads a LOT like a Star Trek film story, I think Trek 6 had a plot a little bit like this?

You might want to change some of the setting (especially the names) so that it doesn't seem so close to Trek.

New task: Spearhead Outline

Here is a brief outline I have for the plot. The time is approximate and free to change. What are your thoughts/ideas?

Spearhead
Outline

I.
President of the Federation is assassinated by a member of the military in the Federation. An elaborate plan to frame the Empire is put in place, to invade their home world. Days later at the Academy, Captain Daniels is giving a speech at graduation when an explosion goes off, targeting key military members in attendance. (20 minutes)

II.
The departure of the ENDEAVOR, the lead military vessel, begins the invasion. The Endeavor led fleet encounters heavy resistance from the Empire. During an intense battle, the Federation support vessels jump away from the fight, leaving the Endeavor alone, fighting an Empire Armada. The Endeavor surrenders, and the Empire take Captain Daniels, and his staff prisoners aboard their ships. (30 minutes)

III.
On-board the Empire ship, the Empire Captain tries to convince Captain Daniels that the Empire has nothing to due with the assassination, and that it was an inside job. The Empire has a spy on the inside with vital intel in regards to the assassination that is shown to Captain Daniels, who is hesitant to believe it. To show their innocence, the Empire lets the Endeavor leave with Captain Daniels. The Endeavor heads toward the Empire home world alone. (15 minutes)

IV.
On their way to the Empire home world, the Endeavor encounters another race that they have never seen before. They attack the Endeavor, using weapons that have been documented in the Albitro Wars by an unnamed race. This new race, is superior in technology and offers to help the Endeavor reach the Empire home world faster than their current pace. Captain Daniels and 3 members of his crew (Science Officer, Tactical Officer and Chief Engineer) board the alien ship, and head to the home world. (15 minutes)

V.
The alien ships arrives at the home world, just before a Federation armada. The alien ship goes cloaked, as the Federation arrives. The Federation opens talks to the home world to discuss surrender, and the alien ship monitors the conversation. During the talks, the Chief of World Military on board, confirms the information of treason. Captain Daniels demands that the new aliens confront the Federation, however they do not. The Federation attacks the Empire home world, however the Empire has re-enforcements and destroy the Federation ships. Distraught, the alien ship takes Captain Daniels and his staff back to the Endeavor. (20 minutes)

VI.
As Captain Daniels and his staff arrive back on the Endeavor, they head back to Earth. Captain Daniels ignores orders from Earth command to head to the Empire home world. Command threatens to meet Captain Daniels with force if he returns to Earth. A close friend to Captain Daniels is called to lead an armada against a hostile vessel headed to earth, though he does not know who it is at the time. As the Endeavor arrives, Captain Daniels informs his friend of the information he has learned, but he doesn't believe him. Captain Daniels refuses to surrender, and before a fight begins, the Alien ship uncloaks. Unab;e to sway his friends mind, Captain Daniels and the Endeavor engage in a firefight with the Earth Armada. The Alien ship makes quick work of some of the support vessels, ultimately leading to the surrender of the Earth Armada. (25 minutes)

VII.
Captain Daniels takes his friend on-board the Endeavor, shows him the information, and together, they both go to Earth Command to confront acting Chief of Earth Military. Unable to take him peacefully, a firefight ensues, taking the life of the acting Chief, and seriously wounding Captain Daniels friend. Security surrounds Captain Daniels and he gives up. During court-martial, Captain Daniels manages to convince everyone with the evidence he has of the treason, and the Federation and Empire call a cease fire. The Alien ship appears in orbit after the trial, damaged, requesting assistance. Once Captain Daniels and a boarding party arrive on board, they discover that many of the crew is dead, and a video message is left, telling them to go to their home world. (20 minutes)

Total: 145 minutes.

Christopher Carpenter gave a shot "My Ideas" for Spearhead

Spearhead > Opening Scene Ideas and Questions > My Ideas
The opening scene is the President being assassinated. These are some of the questions that have have been br4ought up for this event to help with the storyline. 1. How is the President assassinated? Is the assassian known to the audience or is it a mystery? 2. How are the Federation citizens convinced that the Empire is responsible for the assassination? 3. What is the reason for the assassination? Change in leadership? Military Takeover?

781 days ago | 0 Comments | 2 Thumb-ups

1. President is assassinated upon his arrival back on Earth. He has a brief discussion with the assassin, but the audience only hears their voice, doesn't see who exactly they are. Thus leaving a mystery.

2. Federation citizens are convinced that the Empire is responsible from the planted evidence that is found. Evidence is "verified" good by third party (third race).

3. The reason for the assassination is because the President wanted to sign an alliance with the Empire, while there were many powerful people who wanted to invade Empire worlds for their rich resources (There is an idea of a back story called "The Albirto Wars" which is set on Albirto (a race that will be mentioned in the film) where the Empire invaded for their rich resources. This could be used as irony possibly). The assassination could most likely be a military coupe.

Christopher Carpenter released announcement "Change of Film Title" for Spearhead

Christopher Carpenter released announcement "Lack of Updates" for Spearhead

New task: Opening Scene Ideas and Questions

The opening scene is the President being assassinated. These are some of the questions that have have been br4ought up for this event to help with the storyline.

1. How is the President assassinated? Is the assassian known to the audience or is it a mystery?

2. How are the Federation citizens convinced that the Empire is responsible for the assassination?

3. What is the reason for the assassination? Change in leadership? Military Takeover?

David Jansson commented a shot

Spearhead > Storyline Ideas- Act I > Do you need a fourth race?
by: David Jansson
I think you could make the story more interesting if the assassination was planned from within the federation. I'm getting Starship Troopers vibes here, which I think is good. (I refer to the satire film by Paul Verhoeven) I don't particularly agree with the call for patriotic violence in the captains speech, so I am hoping that he will have a revelation, and become more nuanced and gain a wider perspective as a key part of the story. You have good grounding if you ask me.

831 days ago | 0 Thumb-ups

Yes, but the more specific the task description, the more likely it is that people will come and offer their ideas. I think this task is to big to spark interest at the moment, Instead of one big goal you need to structure it down to many smaller goals. Write a synopsis that also contains everything that you told us in the "Give us more info" shot. Then structure the story concepts into smaller parts, questions like the one I suggested if you will, that wreckers can choose to focus on.

Aaron Agassi commented a shot

Spearhead > CGI animation/3D development > Give us more info
by: David Jansson
Please!

831 days ago | 0 Thumb-ups

Let the etiquette suit the task, rather than hobbling the task to abide by inappropriate expectations. Kris S., that writers must be thick skinned, is a perfectly common aphorism and the plain unvarnished truth. Moreover, if I am to work on spec. and anyone wants my help, then the necessary price is your cooperation in being helped and without being so touchy or cagey. Answers to my questions in the terms in which I frame those questions is exactly what is sorely needed here. So you each need to decide if you are willing to trust me, extend the benefit of the doubt, and play vall with me. It's still all about simply holding up your end of the conversation. Please just let me know. Christopher Carpenter, it's not just about individual pitching, but about meaningful and effective collaboration through discourse.

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